Finally settled the camp t-shirts n stuff. Hopefully everything is okay.. liaoz. for tis part. Lookin back again.. spiritually still on the low scale.. slowly etchin up.. Tryin hard to balance the pillars in my life, workin to be a man after God's own heart.. will i be able to achieve tis n not fall away along the way.. i really wonder..
Hmm lookin at the plan which i made.. 2 yrs study, decided to abstain from gettin into any relationship.. somehow jus feel very afraid of relationship. Fear of rejection.. dunno how to handle it, afraid of hurtin the person.. Is it a stupid thing to even think abt.. looking at myself.. tis condition.. wonderin which lady could accept it. It not jus being frens.. its living together in time to come,, will the person ever regret... so many healthy guys out there... wouldnt it be better for then to find someone who is healthy. I do must admit, sometimes.. i dun ever dare to look in the mirror..
Life still goes on.. sometimes jus wonder.. will there even be anyone tt will really accept the way i am.. Being frens with pple is okay.. well. jus hav to let it be.. God, teach me to trust in yer provision n guidance..
