Well.. Well

Things seems to be getting it seems. Assignments slowly been clear.. got some time to study for exams still. Still something bothering me.. let time settle it. Someday it will be okay.. someday. Thank God i was able to change my assigment grp without much hassle n trouble. not an easy thing.. waiting for lunch time.. hmm. lost weight.. is it good for me.. jus couldnt help but wonder. watever..

haiz..

Already feeling kinda depressed already.. now its adding on to it. haiz. Thank God tt i manage to complete one of the assignment programming. Jus felt its so unfair. Being play out by one of the team mate. IN the end still i am the one doing it. sickening.. really feel like screaming at him n kick him out of the team n let him learn a tough lesson. Tomolo have to complete the assignment.. presentation on thursay. Dear Lord really need help.. feelin very tired.. n drain out.. teach me Lord to trust in Yer strength n provision.. for Yer ways are higher then mine n You have plans for me to prosper. Draw me closer to You.. teach me to be humble n forgiving as well. indeed Lord... change me.. Amen

Decent dinner..

well finally.... a decent dinner.. miss th carrot cake thinggy. so decided to work it out with macronic instead.. cooked it like the way the fried carrot cake it done.. well as a experiment its turn out to be quite edible.. still. manage to let out some frustrations n feelings.. look ard.. cant find it aye.. its not suppose to be seen haha. am i really feeling happy?

anyway being sick is not fun at all. miss care grp n church service today.. haiz. i should be ashamed of myself... jus last wk..i saw a lady in QUT. She born without both upper limbs.. she talks on the mobile by holding it with her feet. She living life as normal.. moving on.. i shouldnt really complain too much abt my sickness. while there are others much worse then me.. Should jus continue to live a life tt honours God.. instead. gotta press on.. There is a purpose n reason why i am with this sickness. Believe the day will come where there will be no sickness, pain, etc.. Gotta wrk harder now.. till the day come..

Total Make over!

yESH. the make over finally came.. n its completed.. definitely look more neater n nicer. Tts my room make over.. spend few hrs..clearing up the place.. trasnfering n shifting stuff.. table, bed n cupboard..while at least it is now more.. clean n spacious compare to the day i first came in. The present i got frm the make over seems to be a flu.. been squeezing non stop.. feeling drowsy as well. with the room more ventilated.. its better but somehow jus caught the flu out of sudden.

Yup.. finally sorted my budget for the two yrs here.. deducting all the rental, phone, sch feels some other stuff.. i am left with ard 2-5 dollars a day. abt 14-35 dollars for a wk of all expenses tt might be incurred, like travelling, snacks, groceries, necessities.. To be more realistic.. it should be abt 21 p/w. Settin aside some for emergency.. its not going to be easy but God is in control of everything.. yup. jus hope n prayin tt my family side is okay.. Time to rest myself.. yupz..

Awake..

Still awake.. by rite should be sleeping. Well.. one good thing to be happy abt.. since i came over here.. i have been able to sleep well.. guess i am too tired.. to keep awake. Slowly lettin things go its way.. following the flow. Stars are jus so beautiful to look at.. brings back many memories of both good n bad. I need to recharge.. been pushin my body far too hard in terms of physical.. loosing weight again.. now pants seems to be lot lose.

How am i feeling now. i cant really say or explain.. its jus tt. lotsa of words.. i should have say but didnt cone out at all. time to sleep away n stack the words away to some corner.. needless to specify wat will happened... hmm..

To You

Here I stand
Forever in Your mighty hand
Living with Your promise
Written on my heart

I am Yours
Surrendered wholly to You
You set me in Your family
Calling me Your own

Now I,
I belong to You
All I need
Your Spirit,
Your word
Your truth
Hear my cry
My deep desireTo know You more

In Your name
I will lift my hands
To the King
This anthem of praise I bring

Heaven knows
I long to love You
With all I am
I belong to You

---------------------------------------
Song by Darlene Zschech

Indeed a great n powerful song. Reminds me of God's love.... the sacrifice.. thank God

Watsup now..

Jus got a new deal for a new bike.. just wish i could sell my old bike away asap... Am i feeling happy or am i feeling sad.. dun really know exactly.. sometimes it jus a thin line of difference.. but happy n sad are two diff. things.. where am i standin exactly..

Things seems to be inclining towards tt direction.. tryin hard not to dwell too much on it.. maybe it doesnt mean matter at all.. doesnt make any diff. Simply. jus take it out.. put into a box.. n sealed.. buried into the depths.. where it will not be touched, seen or be heard maybe for eternity.

Tired and painful..

Had a exhaustive day.. some more yesterday, went for badminton.. before tt was cycling.. ard. Was suppose to be playin badminton.. but see a volleyball.. haha.. well starting playin with it alone. it been such along time since i actually touch n hit a volleyball.. feeling is so nice n good. after a while, some pple join in jus have some fun digging ard.. after a while continue playing badminton.. as usual i am thrashed.. some how i jus cant seem to be able to play badminton.. but still learning.. after changing over.. continue with playin with the volleyball.. by the end of the sport session.. both my legs r painful, cramming soon. find it hard to walk, sit down couldnt really stand up.. sound stupid.. the best thing i still have to cycle home.. its was the one of the most painful n cycling trip i had..

Suddenly realise it was my dad bday.. so have to qiong all the way.. which makes my legs more tired.. n jelly. Really thk God tt i was able to reach home safely n after tt immediately went out to the strts to call my dad.. COuld hear tt they are happy to hear my voice n talk to me.. i sure miss them alot.. alot.. well i got updates n things sure are gettin better at home.. thk God.. yupz..

Hanging still

hang in there still.. been quite sometime i cried.. i cried again.. News the really hurt n worries me. Looking at my parents.. how tired n aged they have become since i last saw them. It hurts alot.. feeling sad, no one i can turn to.. its jus God i can turn to now.. was hoping to be able to talk to someone.. but no one seems to be ard.. i dunno. Suddenly feel so alone over here. I miss my frens.. family over in sg.. esp those whom i treasured in my heart.

sometimes it jus seems so tough.. being on my own over here. Wish close frens are here as well. thought being attached sometimes do pop into my mind.. still tryin hard not to get involve.. now. certainly not ready yet. My fren has got himself a gf.. fact is tt he already has one in sg.. its like haiz.. world is going down... n down.. hang in there pls.. hav to turn to God for strength n wisdom.. indeed.